Dear American Apparel, In the photo above I am wearing a size small men’s shirt and a size XL women’s skirt that I purchased at your store. Wait, let me start at the beginning. I bought your Groupon. Despite my misgiving about your chronically sexual-harassing CEO, your treatment of your workers, and your objectifying advertising (not to mention some of your bizarrely ugly products). I’m a sucker for a deal, and, sadly, in the age of international sweatshops, your company is kind of the least bad option for mass-produced clothing. I have no need for overpriced pleated pants, but what girl can’t use some extra tights or cute hoodies? I’m somewhere between a size 12 and a 16 (depending on the brand), and that’s at the tippy-top of your size range. But you recently did an offensively over-the-top campaign about the fact that more of your clothing would be available in an XL. I don’t think I need to say too much about this campaign, as Nancy Upton did a great job of saying all that needed to be said about it. So, because no publicity is bad publicity, I looked at Nancy’s pictures of herself in a bath of ranch dressing and thought, “hey, maybe they’ll finally be making that mini dress I love in my size now!” Well, firstly, that mini dress still only goes up to a Large, and while I was able to squeeze into it, it wasn’t exactly flattering. I did find this dress in an XL, but I swear to god, it was like a size 6 or 8 at any other store. I barely squeezed it over my head. I looked like a fucking sausage in a zig-zag casing. I was even a little afraid the waifish girls working there (who were super nice, by the way, I am not talking trash on them!) would force me to buy it because I’d stretched it out too much. I did finally find a skirt that was cute, came in an XL, is comfortable, and wasn’t too expensive (why can’t you make more stuff like this!?). But my groupon was for $100 and I still had a bunch of dough to spend. At least in womenswear, It seems you have strayed so far from your original merchandise of simple t-shirts and leggings that it is almost impossible to find normal clothing for an adult. I am completely befuddled by how far off the deep end you have gone in making weird replicas of the ugliest 90’s fashion. (I mean, where does one even wear see through harem pants? What do you put underneath them? Is that supposed to be sexy?) So after 45 minutes of trying on ill-fitting clothing, I felt a little demoralized. Maybe I would just get a ton of tights and underwear. Had this groupon been a colossal waste of money? (Probably.) Then the denim shirts in the men’s section caught my eye. Yes! I’ve been searching for a denim shirt! I looked at them and wondered, what size should I try on? The small looked surprisingly roomy. I tried it on. It fit, it looked great, I bought it. That’s the point of this story. Your sizing is just so weird. I am a small in men’s and an XL in women’s. It would be one thing if everything came in teeny tiny sizes. Fine, cater to only thin people, I don’t care. I know I will never be able to buy pants at Forever 21 because everything is small, so I just don’t try. But your sizing is wildly inconsistent between pieces and sections. I mean, I have huge boobs, so a man with the same chest size as me is kind of a thick dude- so shouldn’t the small be a little smaller? I’m glad I found a nice shirt, but I don’t understand what the reasoning behind your sizing is. I’m a seamstress, and I know it’s really hard to mass-produce clothes that will fit very many people. But most of your clothing is knitwear! It’s stretchy! All you have to do is make it a little bit bigger and you’ve accommodated way more sizes of people! Why is that hard!? I know bankruptcy is complicated and there are a thousand reasons you all are so close to going under. I’m willing to bet, though, that your complete inability to offer a consistent product that can be worn by a wide range of sizes is not helping. Sincerely, Nickey Robo

Dear American Apparel,

In the photo above I am wearing a size small men’s shirt and a size XL women’s skirt that I purchased at your store. Wait, let me start at the beginning.

I bought your Groupon. Despite my misgiving about your chronically sexual-harassing CEO, your treatment of your workers, and your objectifying advertising (not to mention some of your bizarrely ugly products). I’m a sucker for a deal, and, sadly, in the age of international sweatshops, your company is kind of the least bad option for mass-produced clothing. I have no need for overpriced pleated pants, but what girl can’t use some extra tights or cute hoodies?

I’m somewhere between a size 12 and a 16 (depending on the brand), and that’s at the tippy-top of your size range. But you recently did an offensively over-the-top campaign about the fact that more of your clothing would be available in an XL. I don’t think I need to say too much about this campaign, as Nancy Upton did a great job of saying all that needed to be said about it. So, because no publicity is bad publicity, I looked at Nancy’s pictures of herself in a bath of ranch dressing and thought, “hey, maybe they’ll finally be making that mini dress I love in my size now!”

Well, firstly, that mini dress still only goes up to a Large, and while I was able to squeeze into it, it wasn’t exactly flattering. I did find this dress in an XL, but I swear to god, it was like a size 6 or 8 at any other store. I barely squeezed it over my head. I looked like a fucking sausage in a zig-zag casing. I was even a little afraid the waifish girls working there (who were super nice, by the way, I am not talking trash on them!) would force me to buy it because I’d stretched it out too much.

I did finally find a skirt that was cute, came in an XL, is comfortable, and wasn’t too expensive (why can’t you make more stuff like this!?). But my groupon was for $100 and I still had a bunch of dough to spend. At least in womenswear, It seems you have strayed so far from your original merchandise of simple t-shirts and leggings that it is almost impossible to find normal clothing for an adult. I am completely befuddled by how far off the deep end you have gone in making weird replicas of the ugliest 90’s fashion. (I mean, where does one even wear see through harem pants? What do you put underneath them? Is that supposed to be sexy?)

So after 45 minutes of trying on ill-fitting clothing, I felt a little demoralized. Maybe I would just get a ton of tights and underwear. Had this groupon been a colossal waste of money? (Probably.) Then the denim shirts in the men’s section caught my eye. Yes! I’ve been searching for a denim shirt! I looked at them and wondered, what size should I try on? The small looked surprisingly roomy. I tried it on. It fit, it looked great, I bought it.

That’s the point of this story. Your sizing is just so weird. I am a small in men’s and an XL in women’s. It would be one thing if everything came in teeny tiny sizes. Fine, cater to only thin people, I don’t care. I know I will never be able to buy pants at Forever 21 because everything is small, so I just don’t try. But your sizing is wildly inconsistent between pieces and sections. I mean, I have huge boobs, so a man with the same chest size as me is kind of a thick dude- so shouldn’t the small be a little smaller? I’m glad I found a nice shirt, but I don’t understand what the reasoning behind your sizing is.

I’m a seamstress, and I know it’s really hard to mass-produce clothes that will fit very many people. But most of your clothing is knitwear! It’s stretchy! All you have to do is make it a little bit bigger and you’ve accommodated way more sizes of people! Why is that hard!?

I know bankruptcy is complicated and there are a thousand reasons you all are so close to going under. I’m willing to bet, though, that your complete inability to offer a consistent product that can be worn by a wide range of sizes is not helping.

Sincerely,

Nickey Robo

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